Speekie Engrish
This song started out with a few different possibilities - first as a song about a guy with a little Japanese hoochie-mama girlfriend who can't speak english and just giggles all day. I wound up having more to say about gas station grease-monkeys who don't speak english yet give you attitude if you ask them to repeat themselves. I also threw in a bit about the darlings of the academic world: oppressed black lesbian socialist Professors of Ebonics. To leaven the bombast, I also make reference to American consumerism and the irony of so many American and English-labeled products being manufactured by all those poor sops in China. And it ends with a cautionary word for the recent generation of entitlement-addicted immigrants, to look to their spiritual forbears - our own hard-working ancestors - as the real example to emulate. Wow, maybe someone'll write a dissertation on my lyrics. Wouldn't that be great? Too bad the music is Cro-Magnon beats. But that never stopped all the Rolling Stones Dissertationists. This is the last - the last - song for Right Wing Fiend.
i went out to buy a tank of gasoline
'guy named mustafa, his service truly was obscene
had bushy eyebrows and bushy beard and yet it seemed
that he could not speekie engrish
he came over the border back in '93
the Clinton Whitehouse was offering him amnesty
but then the shoe dropped and immigration policy said:
'go home Pakistani'
will you speak english, please?
andrazii? speekie speekie engrish?
hey little man, how you gonna hear this?
you're showin' up on everybody's shit list
how come you don't speekie any engrish?
in the hallowed halls of the academy
they're keeping busy re-writing history
all those dead white men ain't what they used to be
'cause they all spoke perfect english
the university directory of diversity
could not appreciate his circumstance of irony
he was sending out illiterates with PhDs
and they only speak ebonics
spizzle englizzle? Speekie speekie Engrish?
hey little man, how you gonna hear this?
you're showin' up on everybody's shit list
how come you don't speekie any engrish?
they're drilling oil, we're standing in it waist-deep
in foreign lands they're slaving in the hot heat
to bring us gap and hilfiger and nike
you bet they wished they spoke a little english
there was the Irish, the Germans, then the Cantonese
later they flourished in business with uncommon ease
the only difference was that they learned their ABCs